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    « Seals and Snake Women | Main | Best New Magazine Title 2008 »

    The Clone Whores

    SWkarutaSM

    When I purchased this set of vintage Japanese karuta at Tokyo's SuperFest convention this Sunday, I heard the voices of millions of copyright attorneys crying out in terror... then suddenly silenced. These trading cards appear to be based on some Seventies science-fiction film that I can't quite place. Let's take a closer look.

    SWkaruta1 

    A bleary-eyed C-3PO, a disturbingly angelic Darth Vader, and Daitarn 3, together at last. I can only assume that pink Deathstar is where the Galactic Sucklord resides.

    SWkaruta2

    Look who just jacked Captain Harlock's personal spaceship! This is even better than the "wookie porn" scene in the Holiday Special.

    SWkaruta3

    Speaking of which, here C3P0 trades his usual codpiece for a metal miniskirt and a new lifestyle... Apparently burning out his little buddy's visual sensors in the process.

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    Unlikely allies forge an alliance based on a shared desire: running C-3P0 down like a dog.

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    Remember that scene where C-3P0 snuck up and pushed Carrie Fisher off a cliff?

    SWkarut6

    Pulling on the rubber gloves to rid the world of those damned Micronauts once and for all.

    Comments

    Do these not feel C3PO-heavy to you? I guess they tried to push the "robot" angle in Japan.

    Definitely. There's only one human in any of the illustrations, and she's about to get pulped.

    Come to think of it, when I saw the film as a kid, I only paid attention to the robots and monsters myself.

    LOl @ the praying Darth Vader with the tiny orange hands... more like Dark Helmet!

    The card with the Leia/C3PO juxtaposition includes some yellowish splatter/bubbles that makes me think the artist was attempting to indicate that the shyborg ish a bit shnockered - and judging from Leia's eyes I'd say he's hit her in the head once already.

    Praying Darth Vader is possibly even scarier than the real character. Combine that with "red-sunglasses-hand-near-crotch" C3PO and pink Death Star, and it all looks very disturbing.

    Also, why does Chewbacca wear lipstick? Or is it his hidden sister Chewbaccina?
    And what is that pink thing in front of Chewie and the Stormtrooper?

    You weren't far off on the Micronaut joke, that's a Takara Timanic Space Traveller:

    http://www.bugeyedmonster.com/timanic/space-travelers/

    I'm pretty sure I've seen the art they copied it from somewhere in the Timanic promo ads or catalogs. That's some amazing historical knockoff art there, very Suckadelic indeed! I want to see this movie now...

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